What's So Funny 'Bout Peace, Love, and Domestic Partnerships?

53% to 47% sounds stinkingly familiar.  I guess people in Maine are, as a whole, 1% more bigoted than people in California.  I thought both states were better than that.  I think I should stop being optimistic on this issue and simply be pleasantly surprised when a state actually votes to uphold, rather than destroy, people's equal rights.

Question 1 asked Maine voters if they would like to repeal the legislation passed earlier that year giving same-sex couples the right to marry.  Maine said, "yes, please!  Keep those filthy fags living in sin where they belong."

Referendum 71 asked Washington voters if they want to uphold similar legislation in their state, only take out the word "marriage" and replace it with "domestic partnership".  Results are still pending as of this writing, but it looks like it will win, thus preserving something resembling equality, by a similarly narrow margin. 

Does this mean the upper-left corner of our country is more leftist than the upper-right corner?

No.  It means same-sex marriage advocates won by luck and by compromise, leaving out the word "marriage" even though that is what they seem most determined to win. 

Here's an idea that will win no friends, but makes the most sense:  Fuck "marriage."

The word "marriage" carries with it too much religious baggage to even warrant mention in a civil, political, or public document.  If all we're talking about is visitation rights in hospitals and tax benefits, we need to call all these unions, gay, straight, or poly, what they are - "civil." 

They are partnerships under the law, not under God.  Same-sex marriage advocates don't often argue a need for the benefits of God recognizing their union, because they either don't care about God's opinion, or have found a religious niche that does, in fact, recognize their relationship's legitimacy.  Advocates demand the state to recognize their partnership.  The state.  A secular, non-religious entity.

So, why, oh why, does the state use the word, "marriage," a word so steeped in religiosity it became a point of contention during the Reformation?  There's the answer - it's been done that way for a really long time.  As the man said in Fiddler on the Roof, "tradition!"  Our nation's fathers should have tossed it out the same moment they penned the First Amendment.  Freedom of religion inherently includes freedom from religion, and we cannot be free of something if it is written into our laws and tax codes.

Let people get married if they like - in a church or temple or mosque or interfaith center of worship.  But anyone who wants legal benefits currently awarded to married couples will be, instead, domestically partnered.  We use this system for coming of age rituals.  A person is legally an adult at age 18.  However, in Judaism, a person is an adult at 13.  Just because a boy is bar-mitzvah'd does not mean he can go to a store and buy cigarettes.

I say again, the law must be kept separate from religious terminology, tradition, and recognition.

In conclusion:

Liberals, if you want true equality, abolish the legality of the term "marriage."  Advocate civil union and domestic partnership laws for everyone, gay or straight.

Conservatives, if you want to protect the sanctity of marriage, remove it from our corrupt and secular legal documents and take control of it in your own religious institutions once again.

February 2009 - to college and the capital

February 9th saw the first day of a new semester at Pierce College, where I was taking some courses…again.  Between Pierce and Valley, I was taking Environmental Design 101, Introduction to Architecture, Freehand Drawing I, and Architectural Drawing (AutoCAD) I.  My first concrete steps toward Architecture education.

February 14th saw the usual holiday.  I went to Santa Cruz to be with a certain someone for it.  We also did something really romantic that visit - go to Sacramento and lobby for marriage rights for queer folk.  It rained like mad, we stayed with Adam and Charlsie, and we both got quite soaked before and after our meetings with legislators.  I met my representative, Julia Brownley, who is quite the advocate apparently.  Not exactly the hardest sell I ever had to make, but it was a fascinating day at any rate.  Nothing like a California assemblyman yelling to a theatre full of queer folk and their allies, "Oh, let's just turn out the lights and have a big make out session!"  Sorry, Mr. Ammiano, I may not have captured your exact wording - I'm sure your phrasing was more colorful. 

Most of February was unremarkable though, getting used to the grind of classes and studying as well as the oddities of art and studio design based courses.  Top it all off on the 28th by my Uncle Bob turning a ripe 60 years old.  I think he's been 60 for years though, and probably will never age past that.

June 2008 - to wed and to write

June technically started while I was in Berlin.  I know this because I had my birthday there.  But the new month didn't really feel new until I got back home and joined in the preparations for Lara and Sam's wedding.

I got home on the 5th and went right to work for them.  We rented the sound system and helped organize the outdoor space at their friend's house where they were having the ceremony and reception.  I must have driven over a hundred miles in my first three days back in town, which, for LA, isn't actually saying too much.  The wedding was great.  I played emcee, everybody danced, and the inner circle ended up at Denny's afterward, as happens with any great party, wedding or otherwise.

Then I had three weeks of detoxification, of re-acclimation, of speaking and hearing nothing but English and knowing that nothing would change that fact any time soon.  But now, comfortably collecting unemployment, it was time to enact part B of my post-hospital-job plan: move somewhere cheap and write write write.

I looked into Port Angeles on the Olympic Peninsula in Washington.  I looked into Portland, OR.  I looked into a boat in Coos Bay, OR.  I looked into Salt Lake City, UT.  Then I looked at the fine print on my unemployment insurance terms.  Then I started looking in California, because that's where I had to stay to keep collecting checks.

My brother's girlfriend (now fiancee), Jenny, kept her apartment in San Luis Obispo during the summers when she was back in LA working in a law office.  The rent was steep but the lease was renewed annually and she didn't want to lose it.  I couldn't have afforded to live there, but we came to an agreement where I would pay her half the rent for the remaining two months of summer so I could stay up there and focus on writing without distraction.


The plan seemed fit and fortuitous.  I knew only two people in SLO, just enough to ensure company when I needed it, but not enough to impose upon my work.  I could move in July 1.